


It Ain't Easy, Bein' Green

by soldiermom1973



Series: DeviantArt prompts [6]
Category: Dragon Age, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-14
Updated: 2015-09-14
Packaged: 2018-04-20 17:08:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4795451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soldiermom1973/pseuds/soldiermom1973
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Another prompt from <a href="http://chaosfay.deviantart.com/">ChaosFay</a></p><p>This one was the color green.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It Ain't Easy, Bein' Green

It had been a long day. First, Cullen had gotten word that repairing the bridge in Emprise du Lion would take longer than they originally thought. Then there was the mage who was injured by a templar during training - he'd barely been able to keep that from spilling outside the training yard. He had a headache brewing behind his eyes since he woke up, his boots had developed a hole in them, and to top it off, he kept looking over his shoulder, wondering when Sera's next prank would be coming.

His question was answered as soon as he opened the door to the war room. He was the first one there and was greeted by a bucket falling on his head. And not an empty one, either, no... this one was filled with glitter. Green glitter. It was in his hair, down his shirt, somehow some got up his nose and in his ears and he had a feeling when he washed up later that night, he'd find some in his pants, too.

Needless to say, the Inquisitor and the rest of the war council found his predicament highly amusing. Cullen just sighed and tried to think of a way to get around Skyhold without leaving an obnoxious green trail behind him.

The meeting went smoothly – Mahanon had divided the most pressing matters up among each of them and asked Cullen if they could meet in his office afterward to discuss their next step in tracking down Samson.

Cullen did his best to ignore the stares and giggles as he and the Inquisitor made their way from the war room to his office. Just the natural bounce in his step was enough to shake loose an obscene amount of shiny green stuff. Mahanon couldn't wipe the grin from his face but didn't want to draw attention to Cullen's predicament.

When they reached his office, Cullen stood to the side and pushed the door open with his sword. Confident that nothing else would fall on his head, he carefully stepped across the threshold. The way he walked around his office made Mahanon think he was expecting a darkspawn attack.

“Um, is everything ok, commander?” he asked as Cullen started checking under his desk.

“I know she was in here. I just know it,” he muttered.

“Who was in here?” Mahanon stepped aside as Cullen brushed past him to check behind his bookshelf.

“Sera,” he finally said. “For some reason, she had taken a sudden interest in pulling the most ridiculous pranks on me. That bit in the war room was just the most recent.”

Mahanon chuckled and shook his head. That didn't surprise him – the man was a pretty easy target and Sera did love her pranks, almost as much as she loved her cookies. “What else has she done?”

“Well, let's see,” Cullen straightened up from examining the bottom of the ladder that led to his sleeping quarters. “She shoved some paper under my desk to make it wobble, she tipped a bucket full of water just so over the door there but it wound up getting Josephine instead. Oh, she was fired up about that one, too, let me tell you.”

Cullen continued to search his office for anything amiss as he rattled of more of the pranks Sera had thus far gotten away with. “She hid one of my chess pieces in with Vivienne's, um, unmentionables. She loosened the lid on my armor oil and it dumped all over EVERYTHING...” his voice trailed off and his eyes narrowed as he stared at his desk. “You don't suppose she hid something there, do you?”

Mahanon could barely suppress his laughter as Cullen stood to the side of his desk and gingerly opened each drawer, wincing as each one slid open.

“What, do you think she stuck a nug in there or something?” The inquisitor snorted, still trying not to laugh at the man.

“Well, I certainly wouldn't put it past her!” Cullen put his hand on his hips and looked around his office again. “Maybe I'm safe for now.”

Mahanon leaned against the door frame as Cullen situated himself at his desk and started sorting through his messages and reports. “As I was saying in the war room, Inquisitor, I believe Maddox is our best bet.” He picked up a sealed envelope and sliced it open. “If we can get him out from under Samson's.... Oh, Maker's breath!”

The inquisitor pushed himself off of the door and quickly moved to Cullen's desk to see what the problem was. The instant he reached the desk, he doubled over in laughter. The former templar's lap and chest were covered in more green glitter.

“That minx folded the glitter into a blank piece of paper. Andraste's flaming knickers!” he swore again. “I'll be cleaning this for weeks!”

At this point, Mahanon was laughing so hard tears were running down his face. Not only was Cullen's lap covered in the green stuff, but it seemed like more had gotten into the fur on his epaulets and into his hair. “I'm sorry, commander,” the elf sputtered, “but this is priceless. Twice in one day!”

“Yeah, sure,” Cullen muttered as he tried brushing the stuff off of him. Every time he turned, the sun bounced off of another piece of the shiny green material. “I'll be seeing this blasted stuff for weeks! I just want to know how she found out I hate the color green.”


End file.
